Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Happy Star Wars Day!

May the fourth be with you.

LOL, I heard that for the first time today, and for the rest of my life, every fourth of May, I will tell everyone.  But yes, happy Star Wars day!
How can you not like Star Wars?  "I'm not a sci-fi geek!"  Well, you don't have to be a sci-fi geek to like Star Wars.  Granted, it helps, but it is not required!
 
In fact, you could just be a really chubby guy who has a penchant for bad tattoos.


Seriously, who told this guy that this was a good idea?  Surely his girlfriend who would have tried to stop him. . .LOL

OK, surely he has friends who would have advised him against this. . .


Alright, which unethical bastard of a tattoo artist profited off of this atrocity?  He probably graciously accepted a tip, too.


And so now, to honor this Star Wars day, I present to you a few points about Star Wars that you may not have noticed, or you may not have cared to notice.


#1 Han shot first.  He did; I'm sorry, George Lucas, no matter how badly you want to change the past, you can't erase everyone's memory - you're not that powerful (yet).  For those of you who don't know but want to know, Google "Han shot first."  The original (before all the remakes) film went something like this:
. . .except Greedo didn't shoot.  Could this mean that Princess Leia fell in love with a murderer?

Speaking of Princess Leia, 
#2 Incest is wrong. . .unless you have the power of the force?
I know the Bible says to love your neighbor, but I'm pretty sure it doesn't say anything about your twin sister.
Gross.

 #3 Apparently the rebel alliance is racist.  Why else wouldn't Chewie have gotten a medal?  All the white guys did!
Poor Chewie.  Maybe Leia gave him a more personalized reward:
 She really gets around!

#4 How does Han Solo, Captain of the Millennium Falcon, not know what the hell a parsec is???  You can retcon it all you want, but deep down, you know I'm right.  I don't want to be, but I am.

#5 I guess George Lucas wasn't satisfied with the amount of Hayden Christensen (and his bad acting) in the prequels, but did he have to include him in Return of the Jedi???
NOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooo
 #6 Jar-Jar Binks??  REALLY???
For the love of God, George Lucas, how could you have been brilliant enough to dream up Star Wars, yet dumb enough to include Jar-Jar Binks?  I mean, the Ewoks were cute and fun, and they beat the hell out of the Imperial garrison, but come on!  He even said "Ex-squeeze me."  Did he just get done watching Wayne's World?  "Ex-squeeze me?  Bacon powder?"

But again, I really love me some Star Wars.  I can only pick on it so much because I've seen so much of it.  Happy Star Wars Day to all of you!  May the fourth be with you!
It's true.  You can try, but you will fail.

 



18 comments:

  1. The young Anakin in Return of the Jedi would piss me off if I was Yoda or Obi Wan. For some reason they have to look like they did when they died, but Anakin gets to be young and a bad actor forever! I guess in the Star Wars universe it pays to kill thousands with the Force.

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  2. Yeah, the young Anakin was stupid to be too. Both Yoda and Obi Wan looked how they looked when they died, why not have Anakin by the old man that he was when he got redeemed. Oh well. Jar Jar was just annoying.

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  3. All these stupid made up days are just stupid!

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  4. Some of my friends think I'm a noob because I haven't seen all the star wars films. Maybe I should finish watch them all this weekend :D

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  5. Haha wow you really like Starwars huh
    How to Hack Life.

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  6. Wow i couldnt figure out why there was so much starwars stuff on the internet today, derp. lol

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  7. i prefer the family guy ones xD

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  8. the first picture ... white and nerdy :d

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  9. Great Tats and great pics.

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  10. Wow, that tattoo is definitely indicative of a Star Wars fan for sure!

    Enjoyed this post! Thanks for the write-up.

    Keep 'em coming! :D

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  11. this year was the first I had heard of the day

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  12. Since Chewbacca was present when Yoda was attacked on Kashyyk in the prequels, maybe he didn't get a medal because he already had one?

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  13. Really nice read, i can completly find in points of your blog! Keep it up =]

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  14. That reminds me I haven't seen the movies for a while now

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