Saturday, March 12, 2011

The Billy Blog Makes the ULTIMATE Bacon Cheeseburger!

Have you ever just thought to yourself, "you know, self, I really like quarter-pound cheeseburgers, but I just wish they were larger. . .sixteen times larger!"

Something like that happened to me the other day.  I don't really know exactly how it went down, but somehow I got this urge to make a gigantic cheeseburger, and at some point in time I decided the magic number would be four pounds.  Four pounds of beefy deliciousness!!  Jealous?  You should be.  Read on:

Like usual, I had to assemble the arsenal of freedom:
The astute observer may notice that I have the 3 lb. tube-o-beef (don't knock it; it makes delicious burgers!) and 1 lb. of  hot pork sausage.  Well, I happen to have a pregnant wife, so I have to make sure that beef is cooked all the way through (as opposed to the usual flavorful colors of pink and red in the middle).  We all know that pork fat is delicious, and so if I have to cook burgers all the way through, adding a little bit of pork sausage kicks up the flavor and helps to keep the final burger moist throughout.

Mix the beef and pork together, seasoning with salt, pepper, and garlic powder.  My "secret" burger ingredient is Worcestershire sauce - add it while you're mixing in all the rest of your seasonings, and let it soak in to the meat.  I feel it improves the "beefy" flavor, and it really adds depth and complexity.  If you're cooking normal burgers, now would be when you would make individual patties.  Of course, if you're making the *ultimate* burger, you have to form your burger patty on a baking sheet:

Make sure to douse that baking sheet with non-stick spray, so you can slide it off without too much damage!

Obviously, something this awesome has to go on the grill; was there any doubt?  So, like any good student of the grill, we need to preheat the grill, and we need to make sure the grill is clean.  I also took this opportunity to cook some bacon on the grill; it turned out pretty sweet, but you have to make sure to kill the flame directly underneath to keep it from flaring up!!

Once the grill has been properly preheated, oil it up thoroughly.  Then toss the burger on!
I had to stop and marvel at this point.  I'm not sure what I really expected; I guess I partially thought that the mass of the burger would just cause it to squeeze through the grates like play-dough.  After it cooked for awhile, I picked up my *two* spatulas to flip it, and saw the beauty beneath:
One thing to keep in mind is that the fat from the sausage is prone to flaring up.  This mother is pretty thick, so it will take awhile to cook all the way through, and we want to make sure it's not solid charcoal on the outside by the time it's good in the middle.  Once a good sear was on both sides, I turned off the flame directly below the ginormous patty, but left the other burners on full blast to keep the grill temperature up.  Keep your burger moving, so it doesn't char too badly:

you may notice that it takes two spatulas to flip

How will you know when this monstrosity is done?  Well, I doubt you have any experience in cooking 4 lbs of burger in one lump, so the easiest way is. . .an instant read thermometer:
Make sure to insert the thermometer horizontally, so that you really are getting the internal temperature, and not the temp of the grate or flames.  When you're ready, add the cheese and let it melt (I think I did 7 slices):
When you are satisfied the burger is done and the cheese is melted, it's time to pull it and dress it up!

Tomatoes and onions!
Finally, lettuce and the top:
Wait a minute - you say that's just a close-up of a normal sized bacon cheeseburger?  Well, I offer this frame of reference for you:
What's that?  You say I drink too much Tecate?  Well, that may be true, but I also made a 4 lb bacon cheeseburger!



  1. This looks so gross..BUT SO GOOD AT THE SAME TIME

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  3. Looks a little burnt, but good job anyways

  4. I'm Super JEALOUS!!! It looks great.

  5. i bet that was a pain in the ass to try and eat but it looks delicious

  6. That is glorious, glad you like beer from my country! I'm so hungry now!!

  7. where is the ketchup? that is insane!!

  8. so wrong but so right all at the same time. hope you enjoyed it ;)

  9. Great looking burger, and awesome beer. I've taken to drinking Tecate in a drink called the chelada, sort of a Mexican beer version of the bloody mary with lime, hot sauce and clamato.

  10. oh god i want to eat this so badly right now :(

  11. If I ever had to choose a last meal... this would be it.

  12. Holy mother of Jesus! This makes the Wendy's "Baconator" look like a White Castle Slider from downtown Detroit.

    Watchout Baconator, there is a new burger in town. It's gonna give you a burger beatdown!
    Where did you locate the bun? Hey nice buns!


  13. holy shit, that would have made my day. i wwwannnnt one now.