Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Meet the WWE’s Newest Owner!

That’s right, The Billy Blog has joined the exciting world of trading on the stock market.  The first purchase?  $100 worth of WWE on the NYSE.  As a proud owner of the biggest name in sports entertainment, all of the superstars now answer to me.  Now that I am a major investor, even the Chairman, Vincent K. McMahon himself, must seek my approval!


He may be the boss’s son-in-law, but now Triple H works for me!


What’s that, John Cena?  I can’t see you?  Please.  I own you!

 Even the mighty King Sheamus must bow down before my importance!!!

 Well, I guess kneeling is OK, too.

You might be wondering just how I, a one-time nobody, could make such a landmark financial acquisition.  It was actually very easy. 

(corporate shill mode engaged) 

My mom had been using this online trading website called ShareBuilder (through ING Direct) for awhile, and when she showed it to me, I really liked its format and ease of use.  
Fast forward several months, and I happened to see that ShareBuilder was offering a $50 bonus on your first $50 deposit for a new account.  Well, I’ll take a free $50 any day of the week!  But yes, before you say it, I am aware that there is no such thing as a free lunch; I realize that they can offer this bonus because they will probably (probably!) eventually make it back through trading fees and the like, but if you are the least bit interested in online trading (as well as a free $50!), you should check it out.  If you are mindful, the $50 goes a long way.  In fact, I’m pretty sure that you could game the system by depositing your $50, receiving the bonus, investing and let it sit for 90 days, and then cashing out.  Even if you don’t want to game the system, it’s a great offer, because you can purchase stocks for just $4 a trade.  They have a ton of additional investment options at a range of prices, but for the beginning investor, or even someone who knows what he wants and doesn’t want to hassle with a middleman (for example, market savvy investors such as myself), $4 a trade is one of the best prices around, especially when you’re paying for it with your $50 bonus. 

(corporate shill overdrive engaged) 

Additionally, ShareBuilder has been sending me all kinds of offers to make me love them even more.  I signed up in time to get a birthday present from them – one free trade (that’s a $4 value, baby!!!).  There’s also an offer for a free trial of the premium services, which gives you (up to 12) free trades for a month, which I plan on utilizing when next I expand my portfolio.  You even get free trades if you get someone else to join!  (that’s where you come in)  Again, if you have any inkling of trading online yourself, whether it be big bucks or just a little for fun, check it out. 

(/corporate shill mode)

In your face, Ted Turner!  I’m way more successful of a wrestling investor than you’ll ever be!!!


  1. this interests me, thanks for posting.

  2. King Sheamus just reminds me of Burger King.... or the dude on the Pringles tube.

  3. I worked catering for a Chicago WWE taping once, it was crazy. The Great Khali is the largest human being I've ever seen.

  4. It is always nice to meet a fellow owner of the WWE. Together we own about 0.000000001%

  5. Haha, hopefully you profit big!

  6. This post made me laugh. Thanks for that! haha

  7. great post. looking forward to reading your next one

  8. Baby steps, @Purified Life, baby steps..

  9. Oh my god, this post was full of win. You are my new hero!

  10. That's funny because I was using Sharebuilder before ING was involved. I know guys that made tens of thousands of dollars on Sharebuilder around 2004. I invested a lot when I was deployed, and got killed because of the market slump, but it was for the long term.

    I know you already know this from your post, but I helped my boss do this to buy stock in one of Motorola's split companies (the one who makes the Xoom) and I told him you have to trade in large quantities to make it worth your time. Good stocks run around the $5-$10 range at a minimum unless you want to gamble on some crazy startup. Take out a $4 trade fee, and you've paid for one share of stock for ING.

    I always use limit orders too because of the price. You have to understand that when you look at their stock ticker that's not necessarily the price you'll get if you say "just buy 100 shares market order so I get the price on the ticker!" They have guys on some stock exchange floor, but they also have a list of trusted clients. Those clients put out a limit order to sell 100 shares of stock at 25 cents over market, and guess how much you just paid extra?

    Good luck with sharebuilder. I own stock in almost every company I use, but have since gotten into mutual funds.